Sunday, December 1, 2013

Week 5

I recently was having a huge disagreement with my boyfriend. Instead of listening to him and his side of the disagreement, I walk out of the room because I am upset. I leave the room so I will not say something I would regret. I should have stayed to resolve the issue, but instead I left. This just added fuel to the fire. The one thing I should have done differently is listen to his side of the disagreement. I should have been open minded to hear him instead of trying to flee from the situation. We later discussed the issue a couple days later and the situation became resolved after both of us had calmed down and listened to each other. Listening is a huge part of communication and I really need to practice this when communicating with him.

3 comments:

  1. Teresa,
    You have a great post and I have the same issue that you addressed listening to the other person when communicating. I am glad you both were able to resolve your issue.

    Jasmyn

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  2. Teresa,

    I have found that often times when my fiance and I get in an argument, he either leaves the room or just doesn't answer and it really frustrates me. I am one of those people that wants to solve the problem right then and there and he would rather just drop it and then not talk about it again. I can see, after learning so much about communication that it might be best to just walk away and come back and talk when we are both calm and won't regret what we say. Great post!

    Tara

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  3. taking a break from the conflict so that you can better utilize those NVCR skills of listening without attacking and empathy (and the others) is not necessarily a bad thing. Maybe the difference is that you need to explain your needs before walking out instead of just disappearing from the conversation. Saying "I am getting frustrated and need to get my thoughts in check before we continue this conversation" is showing the 3 Rs to both yourself, the other person AND the conflict.
    ~Lora

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